


You Would Have Loved It

by leck



Category: DRAMAtical Murder
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Love, M/M, Marriage, Past Character Death, Same-Sex Marriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-08
Updated: 2014-06-08
Packaged: 2018-02-03 22:19:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1758383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leck/pseuds/leck
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Koujaku has found happiness after years of searching. But the night before he fully commits to that happiness, he faces his past once again. Kouao fluff.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Would Have Loved It

            “Mom, I’m getting married tomorrow.” He puts out a cigarette and breathes smoke into the air. The night sky twinkled above him, cool air hitting his face as he stood on the veranda, staring absently. His fiancé was in the shower, leaving him to his own thoughts. On edge, he decided to relax a bit. Without thinking, his thoughts flew from his mouth like his smoke.

            “I’m nervous as hell,” he admitted. “I’m gonna mess up—I’m gonna embarrass him—I’ll trip on his feet when we dance—I’ll miss his lips when we kiss—I’ll forget my vows—I’ll bleed all over my clothes because he’s going to be so cute . . .” He began to pace, his thoughts running wild. “We decided on traditional Japanese ceremony outfits. He liked the way I looked in a suit, but we decided this fit us better. We chose our outfits together . . . but still, I’m going to lose my senses when I see him . . .” He smiled, shaking his head. Did it matter? Even if he messed up, tomorrow would still be the happiest day of his life.

            “You probably wouldn’t have expected any of this,” he stammered, as if someone else really stood beside him. “I’m going to marry Aoba. I love him. I’ve always loved him, but I didn’t know what it was when I first felt it . . . you probably knew. I never shut up about him then. I was crazy about him. I still am.” Quietly, he added, “I don’t know if you would’ve wanted me to marry a girl, but he saved me. I can never love anyone as much as I love him.” They had saved each other. Now, he could move on from his past. But he could never truly lose it. A pang of sadness struck him, pricking his chest. Mood dampened, he lit another cigarette and spoke again:

            “I want you to be there. I want you to see him and think, ‘he’s grown up so well. Look at how handsome he is!’ I want you to see us promise to devote our lives to each other. I want you to see us kiss. I want you to be proud of me—I’ve left you no reason, but still—if you’re watching me from up there, please come. I can’t apologize, and I can’t run from what I’ve done to you— _please_.” Suddenly, he didn’t feel like smoking. Extinguishing his barely-burnt cigarette, he felt his eyes beginning to water. It had been a while since he last cried. His throat felt closed and his eyelids shut, more words escaping his lips.

            “You were there—the day I met Aoba, you were there. I never—never thought you wouldn’t be here for this moment. You never saw me grow up. I took that away from you, and from me—but Aoba taught me that I deserve to feel happy. I’m truly sorry for what I did—I can’t even apologize to you—how can I ask for your forgiveness? How can I know that you’d want me to find happiness, even after what I’ve done to you? How can I accept this happiness that I’ve grown to love?” He lost his words to his tears. They trailed down his face as he choked on his sobs, crying louder than he’d wanted to. He wasn’t ready for tomorrow. His mother should have been there. He never had to tell her how he’d fallen for his childhood friend, stomach twisting as he tried to broach the subject. She’d never seen them love each other quite like this. And he had the nerve to fall so deeply after ending her life. Some parts of him would never die. But he’d thought he’d at least be able to move forward.

            “Hey, Kouja—what’s wrong?” He turned his head towards Aoba, who had slid the door opened. He had dressed after his shower, but he still wore a towel on his head. He loved every part of him, but he could not stop his tears. “Why are you crying?”

            “I’m fine . . . I’m fine—“ Aoba wrapped his arms around Koujaku’s waist. Koujaku released an alarmed gasp, but then buried his face in Aoba’s shoulder, the sleeve of a loose t-shirt collecting his tears. For a minute, they stayed like that, silent with the exception of muffled sobs. He was so _warm—_ everything felt right when they stayed in each other’s arms. He planted gentle kisses on Aoba’s neck as his tears slowly subsided. Aoba’s skin started to heat up in response, putting a soft smile on Koujaku’s face. He had promised not to keep anything from him. For the most part, talking through his problems made him feel a little better.

            “I’m fine. Really . . . I just wanted to see my mother’s reaction to when I trip at the altar tomorrow.” Aoba separated them, looking into his eyes with a softened, sad expression. Gently, he stroked a couple of loose strands of his hair, then smiled.

            “She’d want you to be happy,” he insisted. “If you spent your whole wedding day thinking of the past, she’d be heartbroken.” He placed a hand on his chest and placed a light kiss to his nose. Koujaku felt his heart race as his face flushed. Two years later, and Aoba still held this power over him. There was no doubt in his mind that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with him. “And when you trip, I’ll pick you up.”

            “Thanks— _hey_ , you didn’t deny that I was going to mess up!”

            “I already know it’s going to happen! And if you get a nosebleed, I’m not paying the laundry costs for you!”

            “You just can’t get over that, even after two years have passed?” Aoba kissed his lips this time, smirking. Koujaku returned the gesture, kissing him sweetly as he grabbed Aoba’s waist. Under the starlight, the breeze cooled their skin as they deepened their kiss, their bodies coming closer together with every second. Koujaku sighed against Aoba’s lips, happiness traveling to every inch of his body. Tomorrow really would be the happiest day of his life, whether his mother watched him or not. Tomorrow, he was going to marry his childhood friend. Out of breath, they broke their kiss and gazed into each other’s eyes.

            “I love you, Aoba,” Koujaku sighed, sliding hand down Aoba’s shoulder. “I’ll love you for the rest of my life.”

            “Save your vows for tomorrow,” Aoba teased, skin flushed pink from their embrace. “I love you, too.”

            Unable to resist, he kissed him again, thoughts melting away as he centered his attention on the present and towards the future, towards happiness.

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to write cute kouao, despite whether or not same-sex marriage is legal in Japan (it's not). For my purposes, it's legal in Midorijima. Writing this was fun, and I learned a bit about Japanese weddings! The male outfits require one's family crest, and though I'm not sure if Koujaku would want that, considering it is part of his evil tattoos, I found that interesting. I thought they'd wear traditional clothes but have a western-style wedding. And yes, Koujaku would mess up and embarrass himself during the ceremony because he is a huge dork.


End file.
